moments

She gazed at him as he slept, studying his face, wondering how she had ever woven the web she had weaved. Pondering the idea of reaching over and rubbing her thumb across his lips, so firm and confident, the way he held her face when he kissed her. The stubble across his face was mixed with greys and red which always surprised her but she preferred it to be there, gently scratching her soft skin. His beauty was like the calm after the storm, making you feel content and anxious all in one moment. It was overwhelmingly intense. She looked away, subconsciously moving her hand on top of his. It was hard wanting a man she knew couldn't stay but she had known what she was getting herself into. A job in the city; a paid apartment; she couldn't let him turn it down. Neither had expected to light a fire that had continued to burn from the moment of igniting the match. She didn't want to burn another bridge, not another fucking bridge. She closed her eyes, tilted her head up and fought the tears. Her story was full of wrongly timed moments. Her biggest flaw was she felt too deeply, so deeply she planted roots, roots that were nearly impossible to pull up. She latched onto others; valuing their health, happiness and time more than her own. Putting others first so often she had inevitably taught them that she came second. But she respected him enough to understand he needed to go, needed to expand his life. She knew she was yet another chapter in his book and she could be grateful for that because he was also another chapter in hers. She slid back down underneath the covers, turning to wrap her arm around his side. She would value their time they had for she knew that they would meet again, another time another place. She would look for him in every crowded room and every dream she dreamt. The mind doesn't forget and neither does the heart, she knew his memory would be infinite and that was enough.